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Saturday, March 11, 2006

It's About Time

I was just thinking about my experience last Monday as I struggled to finish my assignment. The time to pass it up was in an hour's time. I needed to bind my assignment and fix e certain page that I made an error on.

So I parked my car near the shops so that I could buy some tape and to get it binded. After buying the tape, I decided to sit back in my car to work on my assignment for the last time.

Sadly, I parked too close to the car next to me, so I barely had space to open the car without knocking the BMW next to me. But I was careful not to leave a dent or anything bad. I sat in my car, leaving the door open and I rushed to finish my work.

Then the owner of the BMW appeared in a form of a woman who looked slightly younger than my mother's age, but had a more "fake" appearance than my mom with her tight pale skin and red brown hair. Frowning at me, she said aloud, "How can you knock other people's car?"

I stared at her but she rushed back into her car. "I didn't knock you car!" I cried angrily. I then sat inside my car properly and closed the door. I was really angry at that time. Already I was doing all of the assignment, with a group member getting free marks from me. I had to invest my on this assignment. I came early just to finish this assignment in time. I was tired from staying up many nights, I felt emotionally unstable. And this woman felt like she had every right to scold me just because her car's a BMW and mine's just a 14 year old Nissan.

The next time I see that woman and her darling BMW, this time I WILL knock her car.

Just joking. ^^ But really... what's with people and their grand cars, thinking that people are all out on scratching their cars? Like I care so much. I guess it's true when they say that when you're rich, you worry even more.

I seriously hate my assignments though. And doing them made me realize how much people are using me. I admit though... I do let these people walk all over me, but I'm seriously fed up. I'm not getting anywhere with this. I'm only hurting myself just like last year.

And I'm also wondering why are there people who think they're 'oh-so-great-and-can-get-away-with-anything'? In my latest assignment, I've grouped up with another fella... and he's keen on finishing his work, yes. But he plagiarizes. >_< I told him not to, and at least reference it but he kept assuring me the lecturer won't notice. I don't understand... is referencing that hard? And I can't believe I'm risking my marks with this guy.

I seriously hate group work. >_>

Take care and God bless.

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Tuesday, March 07, 2006

Who I Am



Not only does the AMV revolve around my favourite character of all time, the song fits my mood at the moment. Listen to the lyrics carefully... enjoy! ^^

Sorry for not posting for so long. I got really caught up with my assignments which really really stressed me out (up to the point where I cried a little cause I felt like I can't do anything right. I'm seriously starting to think I'm also too sensitive).

Anyway, I want to thank you all for your kind comments on the last post. It really made me feel better knowing that it's ok for me to let it out somewhere. But I also realize that maybe the internet isn't always the best place to let all of my feelings out. There's always a limit to what I should say... but I guess lying isn't one of them.

It's been an interesting week. A lot of people (including you guys) have been really supportive and it really inspired me to do better in my life. I want to make a difference somehow... but I'm not entirely confident with myself. It's a problem of self esteem, I suppose. Something I've been suffering for quite a while now.

Still, that doesn't mean I can't change, right?

Last weekend I went out with Mel and Vic and it was truly one of the best times I had for quite a while now. I realize how much friendship means this past few days, and how precious they are...

In which I thank you so much Mel and Vic for being a part of my life. And I want to thank all of you as well for sharing a small part of your life with me. ^^

There's a lot to be grateful for, now if only I could hold on to it when I'm deeply troubled.

In the mean time, I need to catch up with some sleep. >_>

Take care and God bless.

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