Thursday, November 10, 2005
Kawatteita...| Your Birthdate: October 10 |
 Independent and dominant, you tend to be the alpha dog in most situations. You're very confident, and hardly anything ever shakes you. Mundane tasks tend to drain you - you prefer to be making great plans. You are quite original. When people don't "get" you, it bothers you a lot. Your strength: Your ability to gain respect Your weakness: Caring too much what others think Your power color: Orange-red Your power symbol: Letter X Your power month: October |
Ha ha! Yeah... my birthday was so long ago... but I kinda like the strength and wekaness part. Is it true? I'll never know...
Life is slowly going well for me... and I really mean slowly. I got back most of my results from my exams two weeks ago and I've done pretty well on most of them. Especially radio, in which to my surprise I got an A. Looks like I can be a DJ, huh? Lol! Joking!
I also got the money for working in KDU. I'm planning to use the money to buy that pen drive which I lost...
I see most of you like the blogskin. Thanks! I like it as well! And after a while of thinking, I decided to put up a tagboard...^^
Short post. But was in the mood. ^^ Take care and God bless! |
Monday, November 07, 2005
Ame no tsubuTo say that life is going better for me would be a lie. Cause things have not gone better for me. To say my life is at its worst and I'm doomed for life would be a lie. Because truthfully, I don't think things are that bad. It's just that I can't seem to handle things right at the moment.
I've been weaving in and out of depression for quite a while now. This past week has been a great example. A day before the holidays I was so utterly depressed because I screwed up my photo journal. Then I lost my dad's pen drive again. And this time, I'm not getting it back as the monitors of the computer lab told me that there is no pen drives within their keep. Struck down by all of this, I broke down again.
During the holidays, I would weave in and out of depression. On Monday I was depressed. On Tuesday, I was angry and slightly depressed. On Wednesday, I was happy and ignorant. On Thursday, I was determined and in a way, tested on my patience. On Friday, I was ignorant. On Saturday, I was contemplative and again, tested on my patience. On Sunday, I was depressed all over again.
It's not that bad, really... I might just be exaggerating on most parts. Cause in reality, I know it's just that I'm perceiving things wrongly.
Or maybe I'm going through this phase of change and I've yet to settle it.
I went to Cherating recently with my aunt, uncle and my two baby cousins. I spent most of the time looking after them, especially the youngest one, Joshua, who turned out to be a real handful compared to James (but he's still quite playful... typical. @.@). On the second day of the trip, we went to the beach. Like all of you know, the beach is jsut not my type of place and this one was no different. But my relatives took off their shoes and walked straight to the shore, so I did the same.
We then got our feet wet and started making holes in the ground with my baby cousins. After a while, my aunt and uncle decided to participate more with their children's activities so I was left watching. So I decided to wet my feet again by the waves. Then another strange feeling hit me.
I wanted to run into the sea.
I thought it was strange. I don't like the sea. I don't like the taste or the smell of it. But there I was, walking deeper and deeper... up until my ankles, close to my knees... then I stopped. I wiggled my toes and cringed. I was reminded of why I hated the beach. I was scared of what could be under it. I soon turned back and returned to take care of my baby cousins, who have now taken the liberty of spreading their faces with wet sand.
But you know what? I was strangely happy because I had this feeling that I was changing. Whether better for worst, I'm not sure, but it's a sign for me that I'm moving on.
And I believe that should be enough to keep me going.
Here's a little something I thought of whenever I listened to Nickelback's 'Photograph'. I changed it to make the song suit it to my likeliness. Hope you all enjoy it!
Look at this photograph
Everytime I do it makes me laugh
How did my eyes get so red?
And what the heck is on Daddy's head?
This is where I grew up
Where me and Tasha used to run about
I don't remember how I made it out
I was so popular for sneaking out
This is where I went to school
Most of the time had better things to do
My student records say I was too nice
But still I never really got it right
I wonder if it's too late
To try to fix things that life could break
Life never really said that it'd be fair
Soon I'll be heading to God knows where
Oh oh oh
Oh God I
Every memory of looking out the back door
I had the photo album spread out on my bedroom floor
It's hard to say it, time to say it
Goodbye, goodbye
Every memory of walking out the front door
I found the photo of the friend that I was looking for
It's hard to say it, time to say it
Goodbye, goodbye
I still remember where I used to play
I could just laugh with all my friends all day
Running and screaming till I got so bold
To go against my mom when she would scold
'He's' the first guy I liked
I'd get so nervous till I'd run and hide
It's been a couple of years since then
I haven't since 'him' since God knows when
Oh oh oh
Oh God I
Every memory of looking out the back door
I had the photo album spread out on my bedroom floor
It's hard to say it, time to say it
Goodbye, goodbye
Every memory of walking out the front door
I found the photo of the friend that I was looking for
It's hard to say it, time to say it
Goodbye, goodbye
I miss that time
I miss the faces
You can't erase
You can't replace it
I miss it now
I can't believe it
So hard to stay
Too hard to leave it
If I could I relive those days
I know the one thing that would never change
Every memory of looking out the back door
I had the photo album spread out on my bedroom floor
It's hard to say it, time to say it
Goodbye, goodbye
Every memory of walking out the front door
I found the photo of the friend that I was looking for
It's hard to say it, time to say it
Goodbye, goodbye
Look at this photograph
Everytime I do it makes me laugh
Everytime I do it makes me...
Take care and God bless! ^^ |
