Welcome
Hello and welcome to my blog full of nothingness. But there's still something for those who care about what's going through my mind. It may be a little bit too emo to some, but please bear with me, all right? I promise I won't be that emo... ;p.


The Girl
I'm currently doing my Diploma in Mass Communication in KDU (PJ). I'm Catholic, and I love Japanese animation and music. As for who I am, a lot of people have different views on this. I could be a bitch to some, and an angel to others. But regardless, I love you all (whether you want to believe me or not).


Links
Friends
Mel
Vicky
Shan
Anup
Aaron
My Anime Blog
My Music Blog

Reads
GaijinSmash.net
Random Curiosity
Chibi Yuuto's CHRoNiCLES


Tagboard




Past
08/25/2002 - 09/01/2002 09/01/2002 - 09/08/2002 09/08/2002 - 09/15/2002 09/22/2002 - 09/29/2002 09/29/2002 - 10/06/2002 10/20/2002 - 10/27/2002 10/27/2002 - 11/03/2002 11/10/2002 - 11/17/2002 12/01/2002 - 12/08/2002 12/22/2002 - 12/29/2002 01/12/2003 - 01/19/2003 01/19/2003 - 01/26/2003 01/26/2003 - 02/02/2003 02/09/2003 - 02/16/2003 02/16/2003 - 02/23/2003 02/23/2003 - 03/02/2003 03/09/2003 - 03/16/2003 03/16/2003 - 03/23/2003 03/23/2003 - 03/30/2003 03/30/2003 - 04/06/2003 04/06/2003 - 04/13/2003 04/20/2003 - 04/27/2003 04/27/2003 - 05/04/2003 05/04/2003 - 05/11/2003 05/11/2003 - 05/18/2003 05/18/2003 - 05/25/2003 05/25/2003 - 06/01/2003 06/01/2003 - 06/08/2003 06/15/2003 - 06/22/2003 06/22/2003 - 06/29/2003 06/29/2003 - 07/06/2003 07/06/2003 - 07/13/2003 07/13/2003 - 07/20/2003 07/20/2003 - 07/27/2003 08/03/2003 - 08/10/2003 08/10/2003 - 08/17/2003 08/17/2003 - 08/24/2003 08/24/2003 - 08/31/2003 09/07/2003 - 09/14/2003 09/14/2003 - 09/21/2003 09/21/2003 - 09/28/2003 10/05/2003 - 10/12/2003 10/19/2003 - 10/26/2003 10/26/2003 - 11/02/2003 11/02/2003 - 11/09/2003 11/16/2003 - 11/23/2003 11/30/2003 - 12/07/2003 12/14/2003 - 12/21/2003 01/11/2004 - 01/18/2004 01/25/2004 - 02/01/2004 02/08/2004 - 02/15/2004 02/15/2004 - 02/22/2004 02/22/2004 - 02/29/2004 02/29/2004 - 03/07/2004 03/07/2004 - 03/14/2004 03/14/2004 - 03/21/2004 03/21/2004 - 03/28/2004 03/28/2004 - 04/04/2004 04/11/2004 - 04/18/2004 04/18/2004 - 04/25/2004 04/25/2004 - 05/02/2004 05/02/2004 - 05/09/2004 05/09/2004 - 05/16/2004 05/23/2004 - 05/30/2004 05/30/2004 - 06/06/2004 06/06/2004 - 06/13/2004 06/27/2004 - 07/04/2004 07/04/2004 - 07/11/2004 07/18/2004 - 07/25/2004 08/01/2004 - 08/08/2004 08/15/2004 - 08/22/2004 09/05/2004 - 09/12/2004 09/12/2004 - 09/19/2004 09/19/2004 - 09/26/2004 09/26/2004 - 10/03/2004 10/03/2004 - 10/10/2004 10/10/2004 - 10/17/2004 10/17/2004 - 10/24/2004 10/24/2004 - 10/31/2004 11/14/2004 - 11/21/2004 11/28/2004 - 12/05/2004 12/12/2004 - 12/19/2004 12/19/2004 - 12/26/2004 12/26/2004 - 01/02/2005 01/02/2005 - 01/09/2005 01/09/2005 - 01/16/2005 01/16/2005 - 01/23/2005 01/23/2005 - 01/30/2005 01/30/2005 - 02/06/2005 02/06/2005 - 02/13/2005 02/13/2005 - 02/20/2005 02/20/2005 - 02/27/2005 02/27/2005 - 03/06/2005 03/06/2005 - 03/13/2005 03/20/2005 - 03/27/2005 04/03/2005 - 04/10/2005 04/10/2005 - 04/17/2005 04/17/2005 - 04/24/2005 05/01/2005 - 05/08/2005 05/15/2005 - 05/22/2005 05/22/2005 - 05/29/2005 05/29/2005 - 06/05/2005 06/05/2005 - 06/12/2005 06/12/2005 - 06/19/2005 06/19/2005 - 06/26/2005 06/26/2005 - 07/03/2005 07/10/2005 - 07/17/2005 07/17/2005 - 07/24/2005 07/24/2005 - 07/31/2005 07/31/2005 - 08/07/2005 08/07/2005 - 08/14/2005 08/14/2005 - 08/21/2005 08/21/2005 - 08/28/2005 08/28/2005 - 09/04/2005 09/04/2005 - 09/11/2005 09/18/2005 - 09/25/2005 09/25/2005 - 10/02/2005 10/02/2005 - 10/09/2005 10/09/2005 - 10/16/2005 10/16/2005 - 10/23/2005 11/06/2005 - 11/13/2005 11/20/2005 - 11/27/2005 11/27/2005 - 12/04/2005 12/04/2005 - 12/11/2005 12/11/2005 - 12/18/2005 12/25/2005 - 01/01/2006 01/01/2006 - 01/08/2006 01/22/2006 - 01/29/2006 01/29/2006 - 02/05/2006 02/05/2006 - 02/12/2006 02/12/2006 - 02/19/2006 02/19/2006 - 02/26/2006 02/26/2006 - 03/05/2006 03/05/2006 - 03/12/2006 03/12/2006 - 03/19/2006 03/19/2006 - 03/26/2006 03/26/2006 - 04/02/2006 04/09/2006 - 04/16/2006 04/16/2006 - 04/23/2006 04/23/2006 - 04/30/2006 04/30/2006 - 05/07/2006 06/04/2006 - 06/11/2006 06/18/2006 - 06/25/2006 07/16/2006 - 07/23/2006 07/23/2006 - 07/30/2006 07/30/2006 - 08/06/2006 10/29/2006 - 11/05/2006


Layout

Title: Written in the Stars
Featuring: Raven from RR Project
Lines: Ewan ko. Lol.
Made by: Miss Misfit
Coded by: Miss Misfit
Image by: Ravenskar
Used: Adobe Photoshop CS2
Created: June 10, 2006
Released: June 11, 2006
Colors: yellow, green, brown?
Credits: 1 2 3 4 5



Monday, November 21, 2005

Ningen wa ningen dakara... shou ga nai ne...

I find hate a very strong emotion. In fact, just hearing it, typing it, writing it, reading it, saying it... you can just feel the power in that word. Even if it is a simple, "I hate chocolate." (Which I don't! ^^)

When I start hating something, I don't try to dwell on it as much as possible. In fact, I would really rather focus my attention on something more worth my time. For example, I hate the band 'Blue'. So when I hear it on the radio station, rather than cursing how stupid they are, I merely change the channel. Problem solved!

So what do you do if you hate something so much, it will not go away no matter how much you try?

I got into a fight recently, but I'm not naming names. All I know was that if the fight didn't happen, I would've been miserable and if I didn't have my friends to support me after the fight, I would've been even more miserable. So I thank all of you for supporting me during another one of those bad moments in my life.

First at home, now in college. It just won't end, huh? But strangely enough, as much as I'm really confused about my current condition and it makes me sad at times, I feel a little stronger now. Maybe it's because I had someone to really support me (thanks Mel and Vic) and I had someone who was willing to listen to me and try to help me out (thanks Afham) that actually made me realise... that actually, I'm not alone. I do have people who really love me and care about me. And I can really feel that now. It's much stronger than ever.

I feel blessed.

So even if I'm called all sorts of names, even if I'm called a liar... this is all just coming from one person. If I really am who that person said I am, wouldn't I be all alone right now? Nowhere to go on weekends, only hanging out in my room but no, I have people to go out with on weekends (even if I am evil on cancelling it on the last minute. Sorry!). My parents would disown me and leave me alone because I'm 'all that' but they still want me to help them out and all that cleaning up and working together in the house with my family actually made me love them even more. My sister would hate me but she has been such a darling lately, supporting me during these rough times and actually willing to help me out even though she's having SPM. My baby cousins wouldn't play with me but they love me and my sister's company, and would always be sad when we had to leave. My aunts and uncles won't look at me but they love to talk to us, making me feel like I'm a part of a great big family.

So no, I'm not 'all that'. Though I can't change what people think about me... I could try but I don't want to waste my effort impressing someone who doesn't care if I drop dead. I have a lot of people who care, and so I need to remind myself constantly that I am loved so that I won't let them down.

At the moment, all I want to do now is to focus on my studies, do the best that I can, and to love and care for all the people who love and care for me back.

But that sounds selfish. Seriously, I feel like I might let everyone down and I'm going to suck at my studies. So I'm going to let God deal with my life. I'm going to try everyday just for Him. That was exactly what I prayed last night because I felt deeply troubled by the fight. And yes, I prayed for ALL of you. Whether any of you guys believe me or not.

Touché.

Love you lots. Take care and God bless.

|

Go back to top ?