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Wednesday, May 28, 2003

As though it's never happened before...

All of these things are all the last things I need. More doubt, more confusion...I am so sick of it. It's not that I don't understand, I don't want to, actually, fully. Somehow, I knew that in the end, it would point out to me. Fine, whatever! As though I haven't suffered before. Pain is something I just have to go trough, doesn't it? No matter how much I try to hide away from pain, it still pops up and it hurts worst when it comes from behind.

So what do I do? I face it. With only my anger as my shield I just scream and run towards it.

Result? I've never been burned so badly. I've never been so hurt, so frustrated. In the end, after all attempts of fighting this thing that happens every year, every month, every day, I give up. Let pain do what it wants. I'm lost forever, mingling with this hate in my heart ("Watashi no kokoro no yami"). And from all of this, I've learned a valuable lesson.

You're alone. No one will be there for you in these times of pain. Besides, it's my pain. Why should I let others suffer for me?

I don't like naming names, but I believe you know who it is. Anyway, thank you very much.

They say freak, when you're singled out,
The red, well it filters through...

So lay down, the threat is real,
When this sight goes red again...

Seeing red again...seeing red again...

This change, it won't contain,
Slip away to clear the mind,
When asked, who made it show
The truth, we give in most...

So lay down, the threat is real,
when this sight goes red again...

Seeing red again...seeing red again...

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