Saturday, January 07, 2006
Nandoka... totemo... ureshikutte...| You Are an Emo Rocker! |
 Expressive and deep, lyrics are really your thing. That doesn't mean you don't rock out... You just rock out with meaning. For you, rock is more about connecting than grandstanding. |
Ha ha... here I am, posting a quiz about my love for rock and I'm going to use a song that isn't rock. ^^
As the days keep passing by I can feel that this year is going to be a lot more different than the last.
Truthfully, I'm quite sceptical. I blame it on my experiences last year... I refuse to believe that tomorrow's going to be a lot better. Or the day after that. I don't believe in next year, or the year after that.
Because I'm too busy struggling with today...
Os iusti meditabitur sapientiam,
Et lingua eius loquetur indicium.
But I cannot deny that there have been changes, and I also can't deny that there's a need to change myself. All that happened last year didn't happen just for the sake of beating me half dead to the ground for nothing.
There is a reason... is it just so that I can get up more triumphant than ever?
Beatus vir qui suffert tentationem,
Quoniqm cum probates fuerit accipient coronam vitae.
My emotions towards things are changing. Nothing's the same anymore. Of course, nothing can stay static forever... change is bound to happen. But I guess just as the tide of misfortunes that happened to me before was overwhelming... this change that's happening to me right now is overwhelming as well.
Is this growing up? Or am I just folling myself?
Kyrie, ignis divine, eleison...
Ha ha... yes, I am happier. Even though things are actually back to the way they were. Maybe it isn't the things around me that changed, rather my perception. I'm still optimistic, but not so much until I'm lifted off the ground.
But I'm hopeful... Yes, I am very very hopeful. I guess it's the only thing that gets me through the day when nothing else will.
O quam sancta, quam serena,
quam benigma, quam amoena
O castitatis lilium
Anyway, it's the second week of college. Things are at it's usual pace. I'm still happy that I got 2 As and 3 B+. (Hey, I did 6 subjects last term. I'm happy with these results! As for my 6th one... it's LAN. My results will be out by this Wednesday.) I'm doing only two subjects this term but the lectures are double so it'll still take up most of my time. Though my Tuesdays are free... (of all days... why Tuesday? @_@)
Other than that, things are as usual here in my world. Lol!!! I'm not a frequent blogger like Mel now... but I'll keep you guys up to date, ok?
Take care and God bless! ^^ |
Sunday, January 01, 2006
Hajimari no jinseiWhen I was very young
Nothing really mattered to me
But making myself happy
I was the only one
Now that I am grown
Everything's changed
I'll never be the same
Because of you
Nothing really matters
Love is all we need
Everything I give you
All comes back to me
Looking at my life
It's very clear to me
I lived so selfishly
I was the only one
I realize
That nobody wins
Something is ending
And something begins
Nothing really matters
Love is all we need
Everything I give you
All comes back to me
Nothing takes the past away
Like the future
Nothing makes the darkness go
Like the light
You're shelter from the storm
Give me comfort in Your arms
Nothing really matters
Love is all we need
Everything I give you
All comes back to me
~"Nothing Really Matters" - Madonna~
And that pretty much sums up how I feel about last year. Also, how I feel as the years keep piling up on me.
It's a new year, and we're all pretty excited, one way or another. We're getting a year older, there are new opportunities waiting for us. What does 2006 have in store for us?
As for me, I'm going to take a leaf out of Mel's book and take a looksie over what happened in 2005. I'm gonna look at the bad side of it first.
- I almost got tricked by a man who claimed to be my friend, and would've probably been raped if I hadn't run away.
- I got molested in the bus.
- I had trouble finding friends in college.
- I got into two accidents.
- It costed my parents two years of their salary.
- I almost committed suicide.
- I suffered a hell load of pressure that I created for myself.
- Someone hates me to death.
- I was completely lost, out of control and just plain depressed about my existence.
Err... yeah, that's pretty much it. There's probably more but those are the worst that I can think of about last year. But still... it wasn't all death and pain last year.
- I got into a college that I've wanted and doing the course that I love.
- I'm a member of Lifeline.
- I got 8 As for my SPM.
- I received many awards, including an award for getting the highest in English Literature for the whole school.
- I made a lot of new friends on the internet. Especially on my most favourite message board.
- I found the people who truly love me and who are willing to stay by my side when things are going really bad for me. I love you all.
- My choir group won in Bakat Asayo. And I admit, that was probably the best day I've ever had.
- I met a lot of great people.
- I grew up.
- I became stronger.
Of course, I still have a long way to becoming stronger. But I think I might be able to do it. After all, I have people who helped me. How can I let them down? So my New Year's resolution is:
- To become even stronger for my loved ones.
- To be more helpful and to be more participative.
- To help out more in Church.
- To write more.
- To go online less, and spend more time to clean up the house.
- To study harder.
- To be a better person.
Meh... it's nothing much. But I guess it's something right?
Happy New Year everyone. And may 2006 be the year for you.
Take care and God bless! |
